Embrace Change

When I was laid off 16 months ago, the abrupt change was devastating. It turned everything upside down for a time. I fought it for awhile and thought I just could not manage my sanity without having a job. I soon found that I was wrong and began to adapt. I developed a renewed interest in working outside and getting some of the larger projects completed. I started picking up books again and over this past summer I reread an entire series of Isaac Asimov books. I started using my sewing machine and began a fairly rigorous excercise program. I also found myself faced with alot of time for reflection and introspection. So far it has been somewhat eye opening and enlightening. Moreso than I needed. At any rate, I was enjoying spending time with Sean over the summer, hubby on his days off, our vacation times in Hawaii and Alaska, and sleeping in.

The hardest and most emotionally exhausting and esteem stealing activity during the entire time was looking for a job. To satisfy the requirement for unemployment I had to find and apply to at least 3 jobs per week. It was extremely difficult to find jobs that required my sets of skills that did not require a college degree or specific certifications that I did not have. It was also difficult to find jobs that paid more than 12.00 per hour.

My biggest disappointment happened when I called upon the people in the electronics industry that I thought were friends. I wasn't asking any one of them to hire me. I simply asked them to keep me in mind and if they heard of something out there to please let me know. I asked some of them if I could physically come and speak with them to pick their brains and get some advice as to where they think I should be focusing my efforts. Only a few responded positively and the rest acted as if they would be "put out" by such a request. I started in the industry in 1978 and my path has crossed with probably 500 or more people. I found out during this last excercise who are true friends and who were simply fleeting business associates. At the time it felt like a huge punch in the gut. Now I realize that I put too much importance on those relationships and it's time to leave them behind. If I ever take on the purchasing function at this new company those same people will be beating down my door for my business. hmmmm.

So, my new job starts on Monday. October 4th. It is a new function and a new set of responsibilities but I'm up for it. It is another big change in my life but I will embrace it. It's time to go back to work.

They must often change, who would be constant in happiness or wisdom.
Confucius

Always remember that the future comes one day at a time.
Dean Acheson

We must cultivate our own garden. When man was put in the garden of Eden he was put there so that he should work, which proves that man was not born to rest.
Voltaire

My new favorite person to quote is Voltaire. He was an arrogant scoundrel who thought quite highly of himself but nevertheless had some interesting and sometimes profound things to say.

Choosing the words for each month

I consider myself to have a fairly comprehensive vocabulary but that does not mean that I don't get stumped on a pretty regular basis. I try to learn new words everyday. Some I would love to include in daily writing or conversation and some I would never use in my lifetime but they can still be interesting. Especially to hear the origin of some of them. The word that I used this month was used in a book that I am currently reading. I had never come across the word before but when I looked it up I found that it could also mean "esoteric" which is one that I have heard before.

I visit a website periodically to find words for my blog which is simply http://www.wordsmith.org/awad "a word a day" and another one which is more challenging http://www.zdaily.com/word.shtml. This one tests your knowledge of the meaning of words.

Since I have a few followers of the blog who try to stump me on words from time to time, I thought I would divulge some of my "secret" sources. There you go, now you know.

Menopause Schmenopause

If you go online and look up Menopause there are medical sites, sites that are funny, sites that try to answer all of the questions one could possibly have, sites that are far too serious, and sites that try to tell you what herbs to take or what drugs are best.

I say, "Put on your BIG GIRL PANTIES AND DEAL WITH IT!". During menopause there are hormone pills to take and a myriad of other treatments to try to make your life bearable. Let's face it, they aren't meant to make your life bearable, they are meant to make the lives of people around you more bearable simply because of the person you are and what you could potentially be.

I mean if you really look at it in economic terms, if all women timed their bursts of bitchiness at the same time, there would be enough energy to power a small city. And if all women had their hot flashes at the same time and you could somehow preserve it, you could cut down on your winter heating bill.

Let's put it this way. If menopause were a roller coaster ride at Universal Studios (I would say Disney but children would be terrified), the ride would consist of many 80 degree ups and downs taking you through tunnels of hot air (hot flashes), cold air (the chills) and a plethora of mood altering sights and sounds which would represent crying jags, angry jags, excitement, sadness, etc. And all of this would happen in about an 8 minute span of time. The ride would be limited to all men and to women between the ages of say 20 and 40. This way those individuals who have no understanding of what you may be going through can experience at least something that comes close.

I have every reason to believe that I am in the throws of such a time in my life as I experience some of the obvious symptoms such as the mood swings, hot flashes, night sweats and the seemingly not present anymore, monthly companion.

Now, I know that there are vitamin suplements, prescription medications, herbal remedies, etc that I could take to help combat all of these symptoms. But where's the fun in that? Some may disagree, and remember this is my choice for me not for you, but I think that I should go through the experience with eyes wide open and with the ability to feel all of the pins and needles. I wouldn't want to wake up one day and think that I denied myself the thrill of this ever so grown up E-Ticket ride that God has so lovingly bestowed upon us women.

So while I enjoy my momentous experience, all I can say is sit down, buckle up, and enjoy the ride with me and I'll try my best to make it bearable for you.

The highs and lows of aging

There are so many products out there these days to "combat" aging. There are boob and butt lifters, wrinkle creams, pills, beverages, etc. I have crows feet and I wear them like a badge of honor. I have no plans to do anything about them. I do scrub and moisturize and that's it. I don't want to combat aging, it's a natural progression. I will get skinny again and that might take a few years off but otherwise, hey, 50 is what it is. There are fun parts and not so fun parts. The poking and prodding and testing is not the fun part. I still have to schedule my colonoscopy. And today I received a phone call from a lab nurse at Group Health about my mammogram. They found what look to be calcium deposits and want to have another, closer look. She told me that those show up in about half of all women who have mammograms and that it is probably just that, benign calcium. They just want to look again and rule out anything else. That is also not the fun part of getting older. Getting what could potentially be bad news. It probably is nothing but I have to wait until the 23rd to go in for my next round of xrays and then wait another week or so for them to analyze the films. Lovely.

The fun part of getting older is having grandchildren. It's having a life to reflect back on and one to look forward to. It's thinking about retirement. It's getting closer to my husband. It's taking the time to enjoy the details in everything.It's developing a good photographic "eye". It's developing new friendships and cultivating some old ones. It's learning new things and learning to like things that are out of my comfort zone. It's about appreciating the everyday things that you often take for granted in your younger and busier life, and it's about counting the gifts and blessings that have been bestowed on you thus far. It's about looking forward to what God has in store for you for the next 40 or 50 years. It's about appreciating everyday as a new opportunity. So there it is.

Now I have the "opportunity" to go bake brownies for my HOA meeting tonight and have another "opportunity" to go vacuum out my car. And then there is finishing the laundry, doing a bit of sewing, and straightening up the rec room to get ready for tonights' meeting. Away I go!